Fall Into Advocacy With PFLAG SDC

Friend, September means back to school, and it also means back to advocacy in our local school boards to protect students’ rights. PFLAG SDC members have been showing up at school board meetings to speak against harmful initiatives including forced outing of LGBTQ+ students. These initiatives go against state law, but some boards are in active opposition anyway. We need you to be our eyes and ears in your school boards so we can notify members of meetings where students’ rights will be discussed. See the article in this month’s issue below and please join us in advocacy.

Please also consider joining as a new member or renew your membership today. You can do this from our website at www.pflagsdc.org/membership/ or send your renewal to PO Box 82762, San Diego, CA 92138.

Velour: A Drag Spectacular! At La Jolla Playhouse

The La Jolla Playhouse invites you to see Velour: A Drag Spectacular through September 8. It’s a sweeping, coming-of-age tale interwoven with the radical history of drag and queer expression. Inspired by creator Sasha Velour, this production recaps the story of a small-town, genderfluid child turned globally renowned drag superstar.

From the often confusing yet joyous search for belonging, to the deep wells of grief that catapult us to face our inner truths, Velour: A Drag Spectacular is a tour de force, rich with humanity, beauty, and above all else – DRAG.

For tickets, go to https://lajollaplayhouse.org/show/sasha-velour/

Support Group Meeting Changes

Due to the North County Coastal support group meeting falling during Labor Day week, the meeting will be changed to September 11, and due to an event conflict at the venue in October, the October meeting will be changed to October 9. Both meetings will be 6 – 7:30 pm.

Big Gay Beach Party & Bonfire

The North County LGBTQ+ Resource Center, in collaboration with Baby Precious Products, is inviting the LGBTQ+ community, families, and allies to a free community beach picnic with food, bonfire, and games. The event is September 14 from noon-8:00 pm. Once you RSVP, you will be sent the location.

Inclusive Soccer For All Ages

The Lambda Rising Soccer Club season starts September 15, and provides soccer programs for youth and adults in the LGBTQ+ and Ally community of San Diego. For more info and to register: tinyurl.com/lambdayouth.

The Club is happy to provide financial aid and full scholarships to anyone who would be interested in participating. All skill levels are welcome.

In addition, the organization Social Work License Map has created a resource, How to Be an Ally to People Who Are Bisexual, that explores the problem of Bisexual Erasure, which can occur in both the straight and queer communities. Find more at https://socialworklicensemap.com/blog/how-to-be-an-ally-to-people-who-are-bisexual/

North County LGBTQ Resource Center Is Moving

On September 16 the North County LGBTQ+ Resource Center is relocating to 1919 Apple Street in Oceanside. The location is close to public transportation and on the same street as other nonprofit organizations that they work with. Ideal!

​Their vision for the new space is for the Center to become a cultural hub and gathering place for the LGBTQ+ community that is both collaborative and open.  As always, the Center offers their colorful, warm, and inviting environment, which is more like a home than an office space.

Another plus of this location is that entertainment and cultural events, health fares, and other events can be held in the spacious parking lot.

For more info and to make a donation to support this ambitious project, go to https://www.ncresourcecenter.org/we-are-moving

Latine Pride

On September 21 from noon-6:00 pm, the San Diego LGBTQ+ Latine Coalition presents Latine Pride — Celebrating the LGBTQ+ Community. As San Diego’s official Queer Latine Pride event, this is a space for folx to embrace the vibrancy of our community and celebrate the pure joy of our Queer Latinidad. Join us for music, food, community resources, vendors, performances, and opportunities to connect. This is a family-friendly, all-ages event.

The event is being held at The Soap Factory, 2995 Commercial Street, San Diego. RSVP here.

Book Club With Author Tasha Kuxhausen

The next selection for the PFLAG SDC Book Club will be Mommy, I’m a Girl! — My acceptance journey mothering a transgender child by San Diego author Tasha Kuxhausen. We’ll meet Tuesday, September 24, 7-8:15 p.m. on Zoom for a discussion moderated by newsletter editor Louise Julig and will be delighted to have San Diego author Tasha Kuxhausen joining us! You must register separately for each book club meeting. Use the link below to register.

Tasha Kuxhausen’s son was just three years old the first time he said, “Mommy, I’m a girl!” When she heard those words, she knew in her heart it was time to embrace a reality her mind had been unwilling to accept. Charlie’s obsession with all things female wasn’t a phase; he wasn’t confused; he wasn’t gay. Although born with male anatomy, Charlie’s brain and heart were that of a girl. And he knew it by the time he was three years old.

Mommy, I’m a Girl! Takes readers inside the mind of a parent coming to terms with raising a transgender child. Kuxhausen candidly and poignantly traces the highs, the lows, and the missteps during the first seven years of her now daughter Elsa’s journey. In following her child’s lead, Kuxhausen found acceptance. This is the story of how her daughter’s life changed her own, and she hopes it brings clarity to others.

We are proud to partner with Libélula Books and Co., a local queer-owned, Latinx-owned, Indigenous-owned independent bookstore at 950 South 26th Street in Barrio Logan. Check out the store in person or buy the book through Libélula’s Bookshop.org store.

Anyone wanting a signed copy of the book can contact Tasha directly at Tashakux@hotmail.com.

Click here for a list of all previous PFLAG SDC Book Club Selections.

North County LGBTQ+ Resource Center Welcome Home Gala

The North County LGBTQ+ Resource Center is very busy the month of September! Its 15th annual Gala is September 28 from 5:00-10:00 pm. The location is the Westin Carlsbad Resort and Spa, 5480 Grand Pacific Drive in Carlsbad.

For ticket and sponsorship info: https://www.ncresourcecenter.org/2024-annual-gala.

Grandparents Community Virtual Support Group

PFLAG National is rolling out the latest in its PFLAG Connects: Communities groups, PFLAG Connects: Grandparent Community. Meetings take place online for 60 minutes on the last Monday of each month at 5 pm PT. The September meeting is Monday, September 30.

PCC provides safe, virtual, moderated spaces where people with shared experiences can connect each month. PFLAG National’s communities gather people to gain support, ask questions, and learn from others.

As with all PFLAG support groups, there are no dues, fees, or membership required to join. For the PFLAG Connects: Grandparent Community meeting, anyone who is a grandparent of an LGBTQ+ person is welcome to attend. We’re also excited to share that this meeting will include a Gender Spectrum Breakout Room especially for grandparents of transgender and gender-diverse grandkids.

As always, the only requirement is to register in advance so that we can provide an even higher level of safety and support to attendees. Register now, and then get ready to join PFLAG Connects: Grandparents Community on Monday, July 29th!

Close To You Now In Theaters

Close To You, starring Elliot Page, is in theaters now!  PFLAG National is promoting this heartwarming film about a trans man going back to visit his family after four years of finding himself in a big city. Says Roger Ebert, “It’s raw and often powerful.”

Find showtimes near you: bit.ly/CloseToYouShowtimes.

GLSEN’s 2024 National School Climate Survey

Please spread the word to LGBTQ+ students in middle and high school to complete the National School Climate Survey at https://www.glsen.org/school-climate-survey. GLSEN uses the data from the survey to ascertain students’ experiences with discrimination, biased language, and availability and utility of supportive school resources. They also use it to create research briefs on school climate in states across the U.S.

The survey website provides a quick escape option that exits to Google home page for survey participant safety on both desktop and mobile.

PFLAG Votes this Fall

This November, there’s a critical election that will determine whether LGBTQ+ people and their loved ones will have the freedom to learn, thrive, and be themselves. PFLAG National has launched the PFLAG Votes campaign, a robust voter-engagement initiative aimed at educating and mobilizing the PFLAG community—chapters, members, and supporters—leading up to the 2024 election.

Join our Love Votes movement and take the pledge to be a PFLAG Voter.

When love votes, it votes for…
…empowering kids to think critically and make informed decisions…
…protecting accurate, honest, and inclusive books and resources that encourage kids to learn and ask questions…
…giving everyone the access to the healthcare they need and letting families and doctors figure out what’s best for their unique situations…
…protecting democracy and ensuring all voters can access tools and resources they need to meaningfully participate in the election process… and
…protecting the freedom to live authentically, from the kitchen table to the classroom to the boardroom.

Take the PFLAG Votes pledge at https://pflag.salsalabs.org/PFLAGVotesPledge2024/

Justice Is (Somewhat) Served In Boston

The Boston Red Sox and Major League Baseball have suspended Jarren Duran for two games after he uttered a homophobic slur at a fan during a game. The Red Sox also announced that Duran’s salary from the suspension will be donated to PFLAG, referencing it as “the United States’ largest organization dedicated to supporting, educating, and advocating for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer people and those who love them.”

Allies Needed To Vote For Affirming School Board Members

We often feel complacent living in SoCA thinking that our LGBTQ+ identifying students and families have legal rights and protections. But some local school boards are creating and voting on “resolutions” in defiance of state law.  A few parents claim their rights are being denied. They would like a school devoid of any symbols, books, or curriculum inclusive of people with LGBTQ+ identities. Some demand parental notification of any child with an LGBTQ+ identity at school.

This year assembly member Chris Ward introduced AB 1955 — the “SAFETY Act”. It prohibits school districts from implementing policies requiring teachers to disclose any information on a student’s gender identity, sexual orientation or gender expression to their parent or guardian without that student’s permission.

AB1955 is being challenged locally. Lakeside, Chula Vista, Alpine, Cajon Valley, and Ramona all had representatives at a Lakeside Town Hall meeting where school board president Andrew Hayes spoke about how to work around AB1955 in California. Cajon Valley USD president James Miller expressed the same at a recent meeting. They are openly planning a legal challenge.

PFLAG SDC members have been attending school board meetings and town hall meetings listening and speaking as school boards openly speak about and vote on requiring parental notification if a child assumes a gender different from what is in their school records. Cajon Valley Union SD’s resolution voted for parent notification within 3 days for children under 12 with the caveat that the home environment is safe. It has not been determined how they will know that or what support they will offer.

We know from working with families and LGBTQ+ youth and adults that not every family is initially accepting or affirming or even willing to seek support and education to understand gender and orientation. It takes time. It’s our children’s right to let us know when they feel comfortable doing so and to have support for their family in a challenging society.

We can all show up in support of teachers, school staff, and administrators who are doing their jobs according to the law. You do not have to have a student in the school district, but you should be a resident to speak. We are grateful to our PFLAG SDC members who had the courage to speak publicly in their Lakeside and Cajon Valley meetings.

Black, gay, civil rights activist Bayard Ruston said: “We need, in every community, a group of angelic troublemakers.”

We do not endorse any specific candidate or political party, but we do support policies that promote the safety and well being of EVERY person inclusive of race, religion, national origin, ability, sexual orientation, and gender identity or expression as is the law.

Get to know your school board members so you can vote for ones who will protect LGBTQ+ students’ rights. Email outreach@pflagsdc.org to let us know about school board meetings where students’ rights will be discussed, and also to get on the list to be informed of meetings that we find out about so you can show up in support.

Thank You To Our Donors!

Thanks to the following individuals who donated to the PFLAG SDC General and Scholarship Funds this past month:

Ryn Corbeil
Raytheon
Muriel Spooner
Grace Wasserstein

Thanks to our regular monthly donors to PFLAG San Diego County. A monthly donation helps provide predictable sources of funding for our programs and scholarships, and we appreciate it very much!

Donna and Jim Bowersox
Lonnie Brunini
B Fit by Bryann
Nancy Colbert
Anna Covici
Charles Kaminski
Jesse Muñoz
Maureen Steiner
Catherine Thiemann
Terrie Vorono

☎️ 988 Suicide Prevention Hotline Now In Place

The nonprofit that operates the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline launched a pilot program for LGBTQ individuals, veterans, and anyone who feels they may be experiencing a mental health crisis; you may call or text 988.

One of the goals is to dramatically decrease the number of calls made to 911 in the time of crisis, as 911 wasn’t set up to address mental health needs. Please note, this new program does not track your location.

Support Groups

❗️Note: some support group information has changed since last month

Most support groups will continue to meet virtually, but some groups are returning to in-person meetings. Check individual group for details. We encourage you to contact your support group facilitator at any time, as they will remain excellent resources for information. The support group locations, dates, and times will continue to be posted on the PFLAG San Diego County Facebook page. You can join in any of the digital meetings. For Zoom links, contact each support group.

Our Vision
PFLAG envisions a world where diversity is celebrated and all people are respected, valued, and affirmed inclusive of their sexual orientation, gender identity, and gender expression.

Our Mission
By meeting people where they are and collaborating with others, PFLAG realizes its vision through: Support for families, allies and people who are LGBTQ+; Education for ourselves and others about the unique issues and challenges facing people who are LGBTQ+; Advocacy in our communities to change attitudes and create policies and laws that achieve full equality for people who are LGBTQ+.